Is it bad to be too good or too strong?

Wow! It's been a while since I actually posted something that tells of what I feel or think at the moment. In the past year, I think, I just posted lyrics of my favorite songs or insights on movies I've watched or passages I've got from websites or books or TV series. But right now, I really feel like "writing" something. I think the inspiration came from a song, a book and a particular experience I had in the past year. Anyway, here goes.

From a book I am currently reading, the lead male character (or I'm assuming he is, because I'm practically just 3 chapters into it & the lead female character keeps meeting different guys every chapter) said, "It's not that you're wrong about guys liking needy girls--I'd basically say you're right. But I think what you're underestimating is how much it means to a guy to be needed. It sounds really silly, but if a girl's relying on you and you come through for her, you feel like a superhero." But he follows up, "In the long term, the girl who can't take care of herself isn't who you want to end up with."

I haven't realized how very true this is until I read these very words. While on it, I remembered a line from a particular song by Babyface entitled "'Til You Do Me Right": "I tried to be your strength, You said I was too strong." To give a heads up regarding the overall message of the song, the girl is trying to enumerate all the reasons why her man left her, and this is one of them: she was too strong. By the way, before I proceed, I'd like to say I don't mean to be biased or sexist in anyway but I am surely speaking from a girl's point of view, a girl who had personal experience on this. Anyway, you're also free to leave your comments right? So getting back to the point of the discussion, is it now too wrong or too bad to be too strong? To have little or no insecurities at all? To be happy and contented with simply just the way you are? To be able to say that you enjoyed yourself? That you're doing well on your own? That you feel you don't need somebody to make you feel good about yourself? Is it too bad? Or if in case you have someone in your life right now, is it worse if at some point you wanted to support him and you tried to be strong for him? I mean, yes, definitely I understand how guys wanted to feel needed. That's the psychology of being masculine. And as a girl, it's nice to know that you have someone you can depend on in times that you need it, WHEN YOU NEED IT. But do you have to be weak and spineless all the time just to keep your man? It's just amazing to hear stories sometimes of a MAN proclaiming how blessed he is to have a smart & independent WOMAN beside her. It makes me believe that there's still hope for the social world. And by the way, it's not that men are not aware of it. I'm sure they're conscious about it. Didn't the guy in the book said men don't actually want to end up with girls who can't take care of themselves? Who's always whining and always moody? But just the same they enjoyed it for the moment. But when is the time to say you had enough? That you wouldn't settle for anything less? When are guys and boys gonna become MEN? What if it gets too late and you can no longer get out of the situation? You're trapped with a whining girl that you no longer have the freedom to find and be with the woman meant for you? Because you settled for something that made you feel good about yourself for a moment.

Ever since I was young, I've been hearing comments that I'm a strong girl, like my MOM, that I'm tough. I didn't know where people are getting that idea or perception about me. Also, I didn't believe them. But now that I've taken a little time to ponder on these things, I start to think that maybe they're right. This is now the question I ask myself, "Is your being strong/tough the reason why you've gone through what you've experienced in the past year?" I don't really want to elaborate on that one, but given all the things I've said here, I'm guessing you already have an idea what I'm talking about. Have I been too strong that he feels I don't need him? That he preferred someone who's constantly relying on him? Someone who's practically desperate for him? Someone who thinks she's not worth anything without him? I can't be like that, because I'm not like that.

I get it now. And I know that the guy meant for me is also meant to accept and appreciate me for what I am; meant to share my strengths & complement my weaknesses and shortcomings. So is it too bad to be too strong? Definitely not. It simply means you're meant for someone STRONGER, BETTER.